can't get photos off camera- bummer

it is almost over. I can't believe it. It has flown by and I don't know where the minutes and days and hours have gone. It has been very sweet and gentle. Me and Jubi hanging out, doing what we can do and just BEING! Jubilee is a lovely human being. She has a magnificent strong and powerful will. It will serve her and the Kingdom of God briliantly. She also has a very very very generous and loving way. I am so thankful for this season of getting to know Jubilee. I am wishing I had taken a time like this with each of the children. Well, it was part of Ruth's life, but it would have been nice with alll the boys. But WHO KNEW! It is such a STRANGE thing to do, go off with a single child and leave all the others behind. Who would think of that. I am so thankful to everyone who has made this possible. What a blessing.

Yesterday I worked on five paintings in four hours. Jubi took a HUGE nap! I need to get a massage! I am so sore. I am really enjoying the oils, but it is harder physically than the watercolors. Or maybe I just have not spent four hours non-stop painting in a while and I forgot. OOPS! COULD BE!

The hall ways is FULL of paintings. I have three canvases left. Basia bought me 13 canvases here. large ones in cm measurements so I dn't know how big they really are. Full sheet size, 10 of them and then two significantly larger ones. SO MUCH FUN! I brought a dozen small board canvases with me and they are all used. Now the pressure is on. WHAT TO DO WITH THE THREE LEFT! I don't think I will be able to get any more. Canvas, the good ones, are all shipped to Germany. Interesting isn't it.

I have been using my watercolors as reference for the oils. I am still in learning mode and having something familiar as a subject matter is very helpful. I think the anointing has transferred, or maybe it is a fresh anointing. I hope it is a fresh anointing.

Last night Jubi and I picked up a pizza. WHile we were waiting a little girl with VERY LONG legs was walking around wearing shorts with her hiney cheeks hanging out. I thought, that isn't right. Then her momma came along and they left. Mom had VERY VERY long legs. The exact same legs as the daughter. Or maybe that is vice versa. I have been noticing moms here in Poland. You can't tell them from the women who are NOT moms!!!

What is that about? There is a sexuality there that is not present in my world. Maybe my world is just too sheltered. I remember sitting waiting for the boys at Redeemer Lutheran School thinking, "GOD! !! THESE WOMEN LOOK AWFUL! GOD! I LOOK JUST LIKE THEM!!!! HELP!!!!!"

It is NOT honoring to God to look all wrung out. It is not honoring to God to BE all wrung out. SO, I started an endeavor to look like ME, to have my outside somewhat reflect my life inside. I want people to be attracted to God in me and I don't want to put up a barrier by looking like a hag.

SO, what is this thing in Poland. Jubi is in my lap talking to me so my thoughts are a bit less focused (HA HA HA!) than normal. I see sexuality there that is VERY unhealthy. Women as objects. BUT I am also seeing a sexuality there that IS HEALTHY!!! I am seeing women with children who look sharp. They still look like women instead of like mommies or HEAVEN FORBID! HOME SCHOOL MOMS!

I am CONVINCED deep in my spirit that Mary, the Mother of Jesus, DID NOT DRESS JESUS FUNNY!!!!! Yet, as believers, home schoolers in particular, we sooooo often dress our kids as cultural freaks. AND THEN WE EXPECT THEM TO CHANGE THE WORLD!!!! SIGH.

Okay, that isnot what I wanted to talk about.

I wanted to talk about this thing of so many of hte moms looking like women more than like moms. I am into boobs lately. Mine are mine again. Jubi is weaned. I put in just over 12 years total of nursing. WHOOO HOOOOOOOO!!!! Mine are mighty minghty boobies. (Not as mighty as Brenda, my sister who I think could set world records, but that is a bit personal so I"ll let her tell you about her mighty boob).

I got in "trouble" a while back with "leadership" in our church. I spent six months praying about what paintings to replace the old paintings with. God was downloading all sorts of good stuff, promises and blessings for James Avenue Church. One of them was a HUGE painting I did during a 100 Portraits concert AT James Avneue Church. It spoke of joy and freedom, but it was HUGE so I could not frame it. I did all sorts of studying as to how to seal it so it would not need glass or plexi. (The plexi to frame it would have been $500!!!!!) So I get it sealed and as it is being hung I get this magnificent download about GOD REMOVING BARRIERS! Barriers between worshippers and heaven, barriers between the congregation and the worship team. Barriers between worshippers. When there is plexi or glass tehre is distortion no matter how well it is framed. God showed me that he was removing the INVISIBLE barriers that cause unintended distortion. It was a beautiful word for the church and one very much longed for. AND the painting was large enough for the space. The other was too small, it looked impoverished. This one held the space and fit. This is a church that has struggled with poverty forever and this painting was a symbol of abundance commanding a space where there had been lack.

I received several phone calls from worship team members who loved it. The prophetic types got it, no explanation necessary.

Ten days later Steve, the pastor calls, and he - even though very prophetic- did NOT get it. He said he felt VIOLATED! I had spent six months trying to call Steve, but he was too busy to answer any of myphone calls or emails. I went through the decoration person to change out the paintings. So Steve tells me he feels violated, like I violated his living room. Well, that was NEWS to me. I thought the church building belonged to the CHURCH not Steve. SIgh, will I ever learn! I HOPE NOT! Then he goes on to tell me there had been two complaints.

TWO COMPAINTS! WOW! That sounds like success to me! If only two people complain when a change is made in a church that is reason to celebrate, or so I THOUGHT! THEN he tells me that someone saw TEARS in the painting. TEARS! They were worshippers and it was painted during a celebration of worship. Yeah, the circumstances going on at the moment were worthyof tears but it was not a painting of tears. The other complaint, "SOMEONE saw BREASTS " BREASTS! SIGH.

I told Steve that the tears and breasts were nore about THEIR HEARTS than MY ART. THEN Steve tells me I have DISHONORED the ELDERS!!!! WHAT!!! WHERE? WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN!!!!! Oops, those two complainers were elders. SIGH!!!!! I offered to change the name of the painting to El Shaddai but it did not help things. SIGH SIGH SIIIIIIIIIIIGH!


so, I just painted three paintings while and now I am back to this story about not being able to get photos off my camera?

Okay, so this happened awhile back and very slowly i have been getting revelation about breasts and women in general. God is okay with breasts. El SHaddai often is interpretted to mean The Breasted One. I don't know of any of God's names that translate to specifically MALE body parts. SIGH.

Breasts are not evil or wicked or shameful. Breasts are part of being woman and God is OKAY with all parts of being woman. God chose to reveal self through women AND men. It is time to just get over all the shame and horror and objectification of being woman and ENJOY!

Okay, I can't remember why I started this. I am hungry and my eggs (from Basia's grandma's farm) are getting cold.

LATER! Gwen